tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8759813497004409554.post3911842802719392805..comments2023-03-28T12:41:45.894-04:00Comments on The Little Grape: Rebel with a Cause (three-year-old version)Mari Passanantihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06899493114555183048noreply@blogger.comBlogger2125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8759813497004409554.post-67308674299391096362013-03-13T16:33:33.733-04:002013-03-13T16:33:33.733-04:00Sounds not so fun. I'm sorry, but glad you are...Sounds not so fun. I'm sorry, but glad you are on an upswing. My kid isn't all that violent, the flailing is way secondary to the wailing. He is all about the scene and demonstration. My big issue is how to take away the object of the tantrum when the tantrum is about leaving/not participating... And making him stay, ie not giving in, disrupts other people's enjoyment of the event.Mari Passanantihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06899493114555183048noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8759813497004409554.post-56879612465287436822013-03-13T12:07:06.068-04:002013-03-13T12:07:06.068-04:00I want to empathize. My son's terrible twos s...I want to empathize. My son's terrible twos stated at 15 months (full on body and head banging into the floor) and by 3 1/2 he had decided that kicking things (his bedroom door, the wall, my leg etc) or punching things (the wall) was the way to both release his frustration and get his way. It was BAD bad. I worried, of course as to how I would manage him because there would come a day in the not too distant future where he would be bigger than me and could really hurt me.<br /><br />Enter the Fabulous Fours and a sort of equilibrium set in. Now, my son is six and is still prone to outbursts of frustration, but at just around 4 things improved markedly. He was much more able to self regulate and de-escalate and I had more experience parenting him and learned that removing him from the place of his tantrum, giving him a 1-2-3 count, and taking away the object of his frustration (that he would have to earn back by exhibiting proper behavior) all converged to diminish full-out tantrums.<br /><br />I also realized that so much of his tantruming was tied to how I responded. If we went head to head, things got worse, but if I could find a way to be playful BEFORE he hit his red zone, we could often avoid a tantrum all together.<br /><br />Work in progress, still, sometimes. Be optimistic. If not, then what, you know?It Is What It Ishttp://itiswhatitisorisit.net/noreply@blogger.com