tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8759813497004409554.post388209408648612260..comments2023-03-28T12:41:45.894-04:00Comments on The Little Grape: Memo to Grape: We regret to inform you that you are NOT the CEO.Mari Passanantihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06899493114555183048noreply@blogger.comBlogger2125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8759813497004409554.post-23719135893946575782013-10-28T12:56:17.149-04:002013-10-28T12:56:17.149-04:00Thanks. I feel like 1,2 and 3 are so key, and it&#...Thanks. I feel like 1,2 and 3 are so key, and it's so easy to waver... We have done the countdown forever with about a fifty percent success rate. (I define success as any departure that doesn't involve screaming, flailing or other disgrace.) And I hear you on picking battles. I do this a lot. But when he is whiny all morning, I play into his hands and escalate over something dumb, like the bike parking that made me lose my cool Friday morning.<br />Still, I like four. Four-year-olds are articulate and game, most of the time. When he's not sending me over the edge, he's a ton of fun.Mari Passanantihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06899493114555183048noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8759813497004409554.post-35109930710838716222013-10-25T23:32:25.472-04:002013-10-25T23:32:25.472-04:00As a mother to a now 6 1/2 year old strong-willed ...As a mother to a now 6 1/2 year old strong-willed child, I have learned many things. 1-Choice is key, up front and right away and MUST be enforced at all costs (however inconvenient). (I did learn, however, that I should pick the choices carefully unless I really did want to leave the play date immediately). 2-It should be a forced choice. This or that. Never more. 3-Follow through EVERY time is key. If you give a choice and don't enforce what was chosen, you set the clock back every time without the benefit of giving a choice. 5-Always give a time count down (at that age, I always tried to give a 15 min, then 10 min, then 5 min, then 2 min warning (that we were leaving, that it was bed time, that it was dinner time, that screen time was ending). Now, I only need give a 5 min warning. 6-Pick your non-negotiable battles and leave the rest. With certain things, ease up, if they are not that important to you. Don't try to win for the sake of winning. 7. You are laying the groundwork now to making things easier as he matures. Things are MUCH easier now, but by and large that is because my son knows there are rules and boundaries to being a productive/helpful/happy member of our family and of society. I used to worry that I was going to break his spirit but the opposite has happened--he's flourished as himself but knows what will/won't be tolerated. That doesn't mean he doesn't still test and push and defy, because he does, but things are diffused MUCH more quickly now.<br />I hope this makes sense and I in no way mean to sound sanctimonious. Just trying to share some of what I've learned and hope you find a nugget or two that support or help you.It Is What It Ishttp://itiswhatitisorisit.net/noreply@blogger.com